Friday, December 14, 2012

Life is What We Make it

Do you lead a colorful life?  I believe that we all really do in different ways.  I had a FB friend a month ago say that I lead an interesting life.  I would have to agree with her.  Seems like so much has happened in my life and I still have a long way to go hopefully.  We honestly don't know when it is the end for any of us.

One would hope that we could remain on a path to an interesting life for many years to come.  There is mystery in tomorrow that hasn't yet arrived at our doorsteps and how we plan to utilize what we are given is up to us to make our lives what we want it to be.

And we need to be prepared for all these obstacles that try to knock us down, as they are plenty.  At least in my life there has been a horrific amount of it and there are days when I just wish that there could be more of those mundane moments.  My life for the last three months has been a roller coaster (one of fear) and I honestly don't want my life to end any time soon if I can help it.

And there have been lots of other times when life has thrown me for a loop.  I guess we just deal with things of all sorts the best we can.  But also most of us are thankful when we can close the door on things and leave it in the past.  Moving on is the best thing over all.

I may be seeing a happy ending soon and I am praying it is this weekend.  I am going away for the weekend to be with someone I haven't seen in a little bit and perhaps ringing in the New Year with happy thoughts of a good future.  And kiss the hooligan neighbors good bye.  I'm hoping it is this weekend that they are leaving.  They seemed to be shuffling lots of things around above me last night.  A good weekend to perhaps be out of the way in case of that 1% chance they mean what they are talking about.

Never a dull moment.  It always seems like there is something to give us more color to our lives and plenty of interesting moments.

If I would trade this situation, I would in a heartbeat, but really nobody would want it.  EVER.

I'm currently at my kids house and now am quite devastated by this Connecticut elementary school shooting. What a terrible thing to have happen so close to Christmas.  Little kids!  That's so awful.  I really feel for these parents who have to face that.  I felt some tears come to my eyes a little while ago just thinking of it.  And then I thought of the parents having to deal with a loss and perhaps looking at the presents they may have bought for their child.

I wish there was no crime in the world ever.  The best Christmas present that anyone can ever ask for is to pray for world peace.  But that will never happen.  There is always going to be chaos and peril, bad people in the world who should be locked up and throw away the key.  Death sentence, justice for innocent people.

I feel blessed today that I have been having a peaceful morning.  I've been thankful to have some good cups of coffee, warm soup and kale, snacks, and being about to putter around in the kitchen.  I made some chocolate pizelles with my pizelle maker for all the kids to munch on this weekend.  Wrapped my presents for my kids and their dad.  Poured out some peppermint patties for all the kids to get their hands on and the rest in the bag are ALL MINE!!!  Organized the pantry and found a small pile of things for Goodwill.

I finished my shawl yesterday.  I will try to put some pictures on soon.  Having some difficulty with uploading lately.  The computer is old and I'm now resorting to a Dynex reader to upload my stuff and yesterday it wasn't even recognizing that.  But will try again.  Could have just been the day.

It took a while to bind that shawl off as there were lots of stitches and I did a really tiny bobble bind off which took longer.

Now I am working on some legwarmers for my nieces as I told them I would.  Washed all my bangle bracelets today and one headband kind of shrunk a little bit too small to fit around any head!  It may end up as a baby toy!  For that grandchild ten years down the road.  One bracelet is now hanging on the tree.

My cats are being good with my little white tabletop tree.  Luna wanted to try to chew one of the branches but it hasn't been knocked over yet!  I should try to get a picture of her doing it.

And to add more colorful events to my life, earlier this week I started looking around for my little green underwater Fugi camera went missing.  I started looking for it on the day I had to charge the battery for my big camera.  Then I remembered that I had left it on the couch on Saturday as I was heading to get my car inspected.  And the girls had a little friend that was there after a sleepover.  Told my girls they couldn't use the big camera but they could use the little green one.  Then their friend said she wanted to borrow the camera.  I half listened as I was thinking of other things.  Then that was the last I saw of it.

Of course at the point I noticed it missing, I began to search the whole place, turning all my stuff upside down for it.  A day or so ago, I started asking the girls about it and they didn't know about it.  Then yesterday, I called their little friend's dad and politely asked if she had borrowed it and said I was just checking all angles and that I wouldn't be mad if she had possibly could have and also said it could still be around somewhere.  Borrowing is different from stealing. But I think in any situation if something is missing we have a right to ask questions to find out.  Not to accuse, but to ask just in case.  But it's always good to check all over the place before calling.  I wouldn't have called, but it was an expensive camera and on something like that and I had thoroughly checked everywhere I had to check that angle too.

And wouldn't you know, I arrive here this morning and low and behold there is the silly green camera sitting right on the couch.  So as soon as both girls woke up, I asked them which one of them put it there.  It was one of them and come to find out, the camera ended up that one of the girls must have taken it upstairs and forgot about what they did.  So after the girls were in school, I called up their friend's dad to tell him that it got found and I wished them a Merry Christmas.

I had another kid stealing incident in 2011 where the child did in fact steal my expensive 21 bottles of nail polish and the parents handled it badly and I vented probably more than I should have.  I had to involve the cops as they wouldn't give me back my nail polish when I arrived at their house.  I won't go into all the details, but the event did spark my Good Girls, Bad Girls novel in a minor way.  Well, only that the bad girl is a thief.  But in my novel there will be no stolen nail polish.

And so, I was thankful to see that little camera today and used it to take a few pictures of my pizelles as the big camera still needs to charge.

My kids will be home soon and their presents are hiding down in the laundry room.  Don't tell.  But they won't be reading this!!!!  Until a long time from now, most likely.

Under a towel!!!  I made use of the wrapping paper my Dad pushed on me last year.  He was trying to get rid of seven rolls my Mom had purchased when she was alive, 11 years ago.  The holidays are always hard when we wish she was still hear.

I think in these times, it's important to hold it together and think of all the good memories of loved ones who are gone.  But they remain in our hearts each and every day.  That is warmth to grasp our souls.  It's so important to keep their spirits alive.

And to end this post, how about your dreams?  I kind of had some nice ones this morning.  Dreaming of rekindling something and also thinking of my novels.  I kind of had those nice dreams of fame (not so much the fortune that usually comes with it although it would be nice) and recognition.  I've always desired that.  Not that it will ever happen, but it's a really nice thought for all of us to dream, pray and hope that good things will come.  But all I got thinking about in my dreams was of a nice little house to end my days and love, and filling the house with pretty things (most of which I already have) and those new pretty things to create.

I have pretty much everything I want.  I don't need a lot of the frivolous things.  Although I've been enjoying new yarn colors, new Hitchcock movies (although Rear Window is my favorite and yes, I will stick it to my butt, Martha).  Martha is my sister.  She told me quite a while ago to start watching Front Window and then when she heard I had watched it some more she made the other comment).  We call each other all the time and I am thankful that I have good siblings in my life.  Even though at some times, I want to just literally ring their necks!!  Not really, but you know how it is when your siblings tell you anything because they think they can!

For someone who doesn't have a sibling who has never EVER done something that you just want to scream, you haven't had a sibling yet.  Or you need one!!!  It's I guess all a part of the fun of leading an interesting life!!!  Because you always know that, the next moment you are going to be so happy on the phone with them again talking to them as if they are right next to you even though they are far away.  I wish mine lived closer because if she did, I would be calling her over to share coffee and treats, drag her shopping with me and everything else that makes a sister or a brother simply great.

I'm just at a point when I am starting to see the light at the end of a dark tunnel and the future could be really great.  I think the important thing in this life however we choose to live it is just to go with the flow of the moment as we never know what tomorrow may bring for us.

There is the road to Holland that is wonderful when you thought you wanted to go to Italy, and you got sidetracked and travelled to the place with the pretty yellow and red tulips.  I went there because of my Down Syndrome son, Jake and I've never looked back.  Yes, Italy would be nice to someday see, but it's not really important if one doesn't end up getting there.  I hear that a few streets away can be quite beautiful too.  Or what about that early morning walk that makes you look at everything in a new light?

Just to be alive should be on our agendas every day as there are so many people that are now angels living among us and to be breathing air into our lungs is so much more of a gift than anything else that can ever be under your tree this year.  All that is good too, but it's not what counts.  It's having loved ones around us to light a path to a brand new day.

A brand new year.  2013 is almost here.  Wow, 18 children, 8 adults.  That's terrible. What a sad, sad thing.  Let us all pray that 2013 brings these families and friends some healing and people to surround them with ways to get past this.  Finding a way to help in any way you can is so great.  No matter how big or small that it may be.

No task is too great or too small.  My Mom always used to say that we should be happy in everything we do, even down to the man peeling that orange."  Or something like that.  It's like the feather floating all over the place in Forrest Gump.  Nobody stops to think about the feather, but it too has a very important place in this world.

Everything and every one is here for a reason and we should all thank our lucky stars that we are here and not gone.  Live your life to the fullest.  I know I am.  Or at least the best that I can.  I make mistakes, you make mistakes, we all do.  But we learn and grow stronger from them.  We're all human.  We travel, change and grow to be the best that we can make our lives.  And do what makes you happy.

If you seek it, there are possibilities, trails to follow, forks in the road, rivers to go by and make meaning that is US.

Jennifer Jo Fay

Copyrighted December 14, 2012

1 comment:

  1. Visited you tonight, looking forward to reading more from you! Thankful for this day..